3:45 AM Sunday, April 29, 2007
okay. i opened my geog book half an hour ago, but i occupied myself with other's blogs for this half an hour. HAHA (x
you ask me whether i envy couples, i would say 'maybe'. but when u know and comprehend how their relationship actually works, u will realise actually it isn't really easy to nurture a relationship. i'm true right? (: i'm always right. HAHA, just joking (:
sometimes i ask myself, since i envy those couples, why not try it out? but after pondering on that for a not-long-yet-not-short amount of time, i thought - hey, whats with me? i still have like so many years of my life to go. and there's nobody that i can pour all my love to right? so, i figured its impractical. furthermore, all of us are still so immature at this time, we can't make right decisions for ourselves, we are restricted to many 'stuffs' outside the world. and i told myself i would only accept a relationship WHEN my spiritual life AND my partner's spiritual life is in control. i must always remember this - i CANNOT FORSAKE the Lord for my partner.
of cos, my partner will have to be a christian! (:
i ever asked myself if i liked anyone. i couldn't provide an answer. however, i can guarantee that i am INFATUATED with some. be it looks, characters. the trap of 'love' is not really easy to be dealt with.
my best friend has left me. left me for her boyfriend. however, i can understand. but, sometimes, i just can't accept it. sometimes i sucks just thinking about it. but, face the facts, people. (: life has to go on. life GOT to go on. i would not and MUST NOT talk to either of them now. i CANNOT spoil their relationship. i would be really mean if i do so. sometimes i feel really really lonely. its as if there is NOBODY there for me, NOBODY to hear me out. NOBODY whom i can confide in, NOBODY who UNDERSTANDS me. but, someone has enlightened me, my brother-in-christ, he told me, "don't be lonely. you'll always have God." which was, very much true. i ALWAYS and WILL have God! why should i be lonely? without even speaking but just THINKING God can listen and comprehend. isn't it miraculous? thanks timothy, for this enlightening advice! (:
u may ask how i know God can hear me, how i know God exist. well, now and then i'm constantly asking myself that question. but, believe it or not, if you entrust youself to him u will find that life's alot easier, alot more fun, and defintely alot more meaningful.
2 days in this week i felt really emo. i suppose it wasn't out of the blue. but i guess i won't say so as not to ruin my sis' perfect-for-now relationship. it all started with my mum DISallowing me to go for the Perth trip, and it sort of SUCKED. cos i figured there was no way i could make her change her mind.
however, i pulled myself together, and prayed to the Lord for the longest time ever. and the next day, my mum was very happy and she just allowed me to go for the trip! she immediately asked me to sign the cheque which was WOW.
in my haste of asking her to sign the check, i wrote a wrong amount. the first deposit was $669, but i end up putting $699 on the cheque. how stupid was i =.= hahas. but she wasn't angry. she merely just said its okay! (:
i so thank God! (((((((((: nothing could express my joy at that moment of time you know! i think for those 'experienced' couple, it would feel even better then your first kiss! hahahs. thank you Lord!
oh my, look at the time! i need to revise Geog or else im gonna be in deep shit. well actually i AM already in deep shit, just that i don't want to sink deeper in. HAHAH (:
CHEERS, people! (:
